The Age of Loss

I realized last night and thought about it coming to work today of all the losses in my life.  I lost my youngest brother when I was six years old to pneumonia and he was eight months old.  I’ve lost my grandparents and some very special uncles. I lost both of my parents to brain cancer.  Just recently and over the last three or four years I’ve lost some very close friends.  I’m amazed at how many friends I have that are widows and they are all my age.  I worry that they may have financial difficulties if they don’t have their homes and vehicles paid for, that they may not have family close by, that they will have an empty void in their lives because that spouse is gone.  I can’t begin to imagine what they are going through.  I feel very fortunate and blessed that I have my husband and kids close to home.

I feel like I take advantage of the fact that I have a husband and close friends with me daily.  It makes me wonder, do I appreciate this man enough?  Do I tell him enough how much he means to me and how much I love him?  Do I appreciate all he does for me every day?  Do I know him well enough after forty years together?   This goes for my friends too, do I tell them or show them how much I appreciate their being a part of my life?  Maybe, maybe I need to show him and everyone more often and in better ways?  I’ll work on that.

I met my husband 40+ years ago when he dated my sister a couple times and they parted ways but he and I became close friend and six months later we married.  He gave me a home, companionship, my two beautiful children and also gave a home to my handicapped brother when my mom passed away.  Not many men I know would have taken on that burden.  He’s taught me to respect and love the outdoors and hunting.  He’s taught me so much about farming and living off the land as he was taught.  I’m not saying he’s perfect but he is a perfect fit for me!!  He is the reason, I believe, that I am the woman I am today.  I don’t think I would change a thing in my life if I could go back EXCEPT change the closeness I use to have with my siblings.

BUT,  life is good and I do love my family and friends very much!!  (Note: This photo is 10 years ago but he’s my sweetheart!!)

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